Am I Better Off Single?

A friend emailed me this story today as inspiration for our burgeoning blog. It brought me back to the days before grad school when I "worked" at a horrible job for about 4 years. I got so efficient at the job that I could get everything done in about an hour a day and I spent the rest of the time googling stuff. When I was a single gal I often perused websites like MSN and Yahoo, and when I really had nothing to do, iVillage. Articles in the Single Woman content areas of these websites can generally be divided into two categories: (1) reasons you should be relieved not to have a stupid man dragging you down, and (2) ways you can change your appearance, interests, daily routine, and/or general outlook on life in order to find Mr. Right in 30 days or less. This article falls into the former.

So that brings us to Are you better off single?, which offers "10 fascinating benefits to being unmarried." I'll be the judge.

1. You have a better body. I did have a better body when I was single, and as expected I got all fat and happy when I began seriously dating Husband. While my single self was indeed skinny, I thought I needed to be in order to become un-single. I am getting back into shape again and it's nice that I am doing it for myself this time, not some man I haven't even met yet.
   
2. You are more likely to achieve great things. I think this is crap. I would be in exactly the same place professionally right now with or without Husband. I might be living with my parents, but I would still have done the whole grad school bit. I also don't like the implication that the "lack of familial responsibilities" allows you to "achieve great things." As if being responsible for a family is not great?
3. You do less housework. Also crap. I've never been really into housework and now that I'm married at least I have the option to trade sex for emptying the dishwasher if I am so inclined.
   
4. You can do what you want with your money—including keep it. In general being accountable to someone else financially wouldn't be the worst thing in the world for most people I know. Anyway, Husband and I are pretty much on the same page in this department so this isn't a big deal for us. Also, Husband makes way more money than I ever will so it would be kind of lame for me to bitch about having to make big money decisions together.
   
5. You have better sex. Um, that was not my experience.
   
6. You’re better rested and smarter. I have grown to like sharing a bed and I miss Husband when he is gone. It's just that he does this weird clicking thing with his teeth that wakes me up. And when he rolls over he takes the covers with him. And also he kicks me sometimes. And sometimes throws an elbow in my back. So I guess I will have to agree with this one.
7. You're less depressed. I think this one is more a matter of quality over quantity because being depressed when your single is much more fun than when your married. When I was single and depressed I would go to Target and buy a season of Sex and the City on DVD and a tube of cookie dough and make it a weekend. Now I have to talk about my feelings, blah, blah, blah.
   
8. You have better friendships. I had more friends when I was single, but the strongest friendships have survived. Still, I think this one is probably true.
   
9. Your travel tales are enviable. I'm torn on this one. When I was single I was adventurous but poor. Now we kinda have the means but Husband only wants to go to first world countries where everyone speaks English. So I can see this one being true.
10. You know yourself—and what you want out of a relationship. "You’re a better catch now than you were at 20... you’re more interesting and more self-aware." That sounds like a reason to be glad you're not 20, not a reason to be glad you're single.