OMG, TMI!

I got the following email from a friend the other day..

So I have a UTI and I went to the doctor and she went on and on about how teachers get UTIs a lot because they don't pee enough or drink enough. I was like "I'm not a teacher." But I thought I would pass along her warning to you since you actually are a teacher.

See, aren't you glad I'm around?

It reminded me of an unpleasant trip to the student health center my freshman year in college...

ME: I have to pee all the time and it really hurts.
NURSE: Sounds like a urinary tract infection. Have you had intercourse recently?
ME: No. (What I'm really thinking: It's March and I have yet to meet a straight man here. This is the f*cking Village, after all.)
NURSE: Nothing has been bumping up against the area? (Demonstrates what bumping means by smacking her hands together, in case I managed to get into a prestigious university without ever encountering that particular verb.)
ME: Um, no. Is there some kind of prescription you can write or something?
NURSE: You should refrain from having sex, or letting anything bump up against your vulva, until you are done with these antibiotics.
ME: Sure thing.

I hope you enjoyed this post. I wrote it instead of preparing for the job interview I have tomorrow. Wish me luck!